unfuckwitable♥

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Tuesday, May 5, 2009
8:56 PM
as of right now

First things first I think I need to take a minute to breathe. College bullshit has my at my wits end with stress. I have to pay for my college completely with student loans and I have not even the slightest clue where to start to get one of these fuckers. Then, I have to get my shots so I can send my records in with my application fee so that I can apply to room with my bfff. Its just pissing me off because I hate not being able to just do something. Second thing I just HAVE to mention is I'm so about to graduate. Tomorrow is the last day of my high school career and I'll be honest; I really have mixed feelings about it. I'm so happy that its over on one hand but I'm so going to miss all my friends and teachers that I have to leave behind. And then I'm scared because the real world is about to hit me smack dab in the face, no numbing. Its okay, I'm very resilient, I'll bounce back. Why do I feel like every time I get the upper hand on my "situation" I just backslide right back into the madness? Why won't you just disappear? And why can't I really want you to? I want to burn you out of my memories but my heart isn't letting me. Anyways, I'm actually pretty happy with my life right now aside from that and the stress. My special someone just keeps making me smile. I'm so about to be out this bitch and I don't think I'm bringing you with me. I did mean what I said to you but push that shit aside because feelings are just that; feelings. They're all in my head and I know I have to and can control them. I may not be able to destroy them but I'm doing pretty good with not acting on them. Scratch that, I'm on my A game. You'll think of me while I'm on my road to my forever. :) "Someday, I'm gonna run across your mind but don't worry, I'll be fine. I'm gonna be alright. While you're sleeping with your pride, wishing I could hold you tight.. I'll be over you and on with my life." & that's all I motherfucking wrote. Toodles, bitches.

bonjour.

bob marley > EVERYTHING